Thursday, October 24
Day 11
Lord, you are the God who saves me;
day and night I cry out to you.
May my prayer come before you;
turn your ear to my cry.
I am overwhelmed with troubles
and my life draws near to death.
I am counted among those who go down to the pit;
I am like one without strength.
I am set apart with the dead,
like the slain who lie in the grave,
whom you remember no more,
who are cut off from your care.
You have put me in the lowest pit,
in the darkest depths.
Your wrath lies heavily on me;
you have overwhelmed me with all your waves.
You have taken from me my closest friends
and have made me repulsive to them.
I am confined and cannot escape;
my eyes are dim with grief.
I call to you, Lord, every day;
I spread out my hands to you.
Do you show your wonders to the dead?
Do their spirits rise up and praise you?
Is your love declared in the grave,
your faithfulness in Destruction[e]?
Are your wonders known in the place of darkness,
or your righteous deeds in the land of oblivion?
But I cry to you for help, Lord;
in the morning my prayer comes before you.
Why, Lord, do you reject me
and hide your face from me?
From my youth I have suffered and been close to death;
I have borne your terrors and am in despair.
Your wrath has swept over me;
your terrors have destroyed me.
All day long they surround me like a flood;
they have completely engulfed me.
You have taken from me friend and neighbor—
darkness is my closest friend.
– Psalm 88
God Heals
In 2008, I was standing around the kitchen island with my wife and some of our best friends, discussing random life issues. I mentioned a painful moment that had happened in my past when Ben said, “You know, Matt, I’ve heard you mention that a lot, but I’ve never really known what happened.” I told him I would be happy to share, and over the next 5-10 minutes I began to verbally unload on him and his wife. The longer I spoke, the more pain and anger came out. When I was finally done, he said something like, “Dang man. Sounds like you haven’t healed from that yet.” I thought I had forgiven those who had hurt me, but clearly, I hadn’t.
Over the next year, I worked with my counselor and close friends to help me process my anger and pain that came from this event. But my healing didn’t really come until I started getting honest with God, when my prayers moved from ‘proper churchy-prayers’ to ‘gut-wrenching, pouring-out-my-anger, shouting-at-God prayers—the type of prayer we see spread throughout the Psalms.
While there are several good ones, one of my favorites is Psalm 88. It’s so raw, it almost feels like it shouldn’t be in the Bible. The author is clearly in pain, feeling abandoned by God, and angry that God hasn’t replied to his prayers. And what did God do with this Psalm? He left it in the Bible for millions of people to read. Because He is God, and He’s big enough to handle all of our anger and pain.
Take some time today to search your heart. What area(s) of your life have you not been honest with God about? What area of pain do you need to give over to Him? Maybe you’ve been doing that for a while and feel like the author of Psalm 88. Whichever category you’re in, keep being honest. Keep going to God. Keep seeking His face and his healing power. Because at some point, as He has promised, He will bring healing.
Prayer:
Father, thank you for loving me enough to care about my pain. Thank you for not being afraid of my pain, my hurt, or my anger. Search me and know me, God. Show me the areas I’m still holding back from you. Give me hope that You will bring healing one day. Give me hope and strength until then. Thank you that you promise you will heal. I cannot do this without you, Father. Amen.
Pray For Our Church: Take some time to pray for Pathway today—the people who make up our church, the staff, the ministries, etc. Ask God to work in and through us.
Pray For Our City: Pray for the people of our community and ask God to be at work in our hometown.
Pray For Our Nation: Pray for our nation—its people and its leaders. Boldly and specifically make your requests, then submit those desires to God’s will. Express your trust in Him.
Reflect:
- How have you seen God’s faithfulness and his promises lived out today?
- Write 2-3 points of gratitude and thank Jesus for these things.
- Spend time praising God for who he is, what he has done, where he is at work, and what he has promised.
By Matt Barcalow
Matt married his best friend, Shari, and together they have four kids: Natalie, Jaydn, Maggie, and Chase. Their family has been attending Pathway since 2016, and he has served on Pathway’s elder board since 2021.